A difficulty with the word ‘nibbāna’ is that its meaning is beyond the power of words to describe. It is, essentially, undefinable.

Another difficulty is that many Buddhists see Nibbāna as something unobtainable – as so high and so remote that we’re not worthy enough to try for it. Or we see Nibbāna as a goal, as an unknown, undefined something that we should somehow try to attain.

Most of us are conditioned in this way. We want to achieve or attain something that we don’t have now. So Nibbāna is looked at as something that, if you work hard, keep the sīla, meditate diligently, become a monastic, devote your life to practice, then your reward might be that eventually you attain Nibbāna – even though we’re not sure what it is.

Todd’s life was like a river that flows gently to make all who came to know him happy. He always cared about others without expecting anything in return. He shared his favorite toys, lunch money and allowances with friends in need, not to mention the many sweet smiles to encourage people to be happy. He taught us to be generous, kind, caring and forgiving. As one of his buddies, Stephen, put it, “Todd was one of a kind, like finding a needle in the haystack. I will miss him.” Adopting Todd is the best decision that we made in our lives, and we continue to be thankful to have had him as our child.