"I thought I would begin by offering a few reflections about equanimity or upekkhā. This is one of the most significant psychological, emotional qualities talked about in the Buddhist tradition. However, because we commonly translate the word upekkhā in English as ‘equanimity’, it can easily be overlooked or seen as something a bit insignificant, not so practical or even heartwarming, as the word ‘equanimity’ in English can easily mean ‘indifference’, not really caring – it can be taken to be a switched-off, disconnected and somewhat numb attitude towards things."

Based on a talk given at Amaravati – 26-4-2020

The theme for this Dhamma talk is ‘My way or the Middle Way?’ As people might recognize, the title was borrowed from the famous Frank Sinatra song, written by Paul Anka, ‘My Way’, which is the supreme anthem of self-confidence:

Through it all, when there was doubt, I ate it up and spit it out. I faced it all and I stood tall, And did it my way!’

Confidence is definitely a part of the Buddhist path; having faith, having confidence and resolution, these are all aspects of it. But any of us who have spent much time in life trying to follow that voice of self-assurance, of, ‘Even though there is resistance and it is difficult, I’m just going to keep pushing. I will do it my way.’ Or when we are living in a community, or we are in a role of leadership, if we adopt the attitude of, ‘My way or the highway. Either you do it the way I want or you’re on your bike, you are kicked out’ – that leads to stress and difficulty and conflict. Reflecting on this theme, ‘My way or the Middle Way’, there are certainly beneficial aspects to the quality of self-confidence, self-assurance and resolution, but if that is out of balance, if that is wrapped up in self-view and selfcentred thinking, then necessarily the results are going to be painful. You might get what you want but then there might be a lot of wreckage as well, considerable damage created along the way. Probably most of us have had some situations in life where we have come to the conclusion, ‘Well, I got what I wanted, but was it really worth it?’ or ‘I didn’t realize it was going to be like this.’ Or ‘I thought this was going to make me happier. I got what I wanted but ugh!’

In terms of this theme and what would be useful for us to look at, I feel that it is good to consider the way that we work in life – how we relate to doing, to acting, to choosing, how intentions and actions work together. When we use the kind of confidence expressed by Frank Sinatra, ‘I am going to do it my way!’ if we take that approach in life and we act from a place of self-assertion and we just keep pushing – whether this is with our occupation, or working with our family, or working with the rest of the traffic on the road – if we have that kind of contentious attitude, ‘I am going to make this happen,’ since that is wrapped up with self-view, then any kind of work becomes exhausting. Even when we are working with our minds in the meditation hall, thinking, ‘I am going to get jhāna. I am going to make the Breakthrough, it’s Stream Entry or bust!’ This is a guaranteed way to create suffering. Even the work of training our mind to be peaceful can be stressful and exhausting if that work is based on self-view.

Over the last few years I have led residential retreats specifically on the theme of dependent origination on at least five occasions – at Amaravati in the U.K., in Mae Rim, Thailand, and with Le Refuge, at Monastère de Ségriès, in the south of France. Various aspects of this rich, essential theme of Buddhist teaching have been focused upon in these different situations, according to the interests and needs of the various communities. The booklet entitled ‘Just One More…’ – Appreciative Joy: Jealousy, Selfish Desire and the Buddha’s Teaching on the Cycles of Addiction was based on the material from one of these events, a ten-day retreat held at Amaravati in July 2013. Most of the material gathered in this present book was presented at a retreat in Provence, in April 2018; the remainder is from the Mae Rim retreats of 2016-18.

The subject of dependent origination is intrinsically rich and varied, subtle and multi-dimensional, as the Buddha expressed in this notable exchange with his disciple and attendant Ven. Ānanda:

Thus have I heard. On one occasion the Blessed One was living among the Kurus, near a town of theirs named Kammāsadhamma. There Ven. Ānanda approached the Blessed One and, on arrival, having bowed down to the Blessed One, sat to one side. As he was sitting there he said to the Blessed One: ‘It’s wonderful, venerable sir, it’s marvellous, how profound this dependent origination is, and how profound its appearance, and yet to me it appears as clear as clear can be.’ ‘Do not say that, Ānanda! Do not say that! This dependent origination is profound and it appears profound. It is through not understanding and not penetrating this Dhamma that this generation has become like a tangled ball of string, matted like a bird’s nest, tangled like coarse grass and is unable to pass beyond the cycles of rebirth, beyond the planes of deprivation, woe and bad destinations.’ (D 15.1)

There have already been many erudite and wise explorations of the subject published in English, such as Dependent Origination – The Buddha’s Law of Conditionality by Ven. P.A. Payutto; the collection of five chapters on the theme in Ajahn Sumedho’s book The Way It Is; Ajahn Buddhadāsa’s book Under the Bodhi Tree: Buddha’s Original Vision of Dependent Co-arising, as well as many others. The intention of this present volume, whilst acknowledging the already great storehouse of perspectives available, is to focus upon practical means of understanding and applying the principles of dependent origination in order to support the freeing of the heart from addictive and destructive cycles of attitude and behaviour. In particular the emphasis will be on the exit points from this ‘Wheel of Becoming’ (bhavacakka) this cyclical process where the mind feels itself to be imprisoned in a habitual round of promise, gratification and disappointment.

THE TITLE OF THIS BOOK, Mind Is What Matters, brings attention to attitude. It points to the enormous difference our attitude makes as the mind receives and processes experience, and it points to that aspect of Dhamma practice of making everything our teacher. In 2017 at our open retreat at Amaravati Monastery, there were over 400 people attending. Ajahn Sumedho gave teachings every evening, and other visiting ajahns offered instruction and led question-and-answer sessions daily. For some of us, it was a very inspiring time. There were a lot of illuminating and imaginative teachings; for me it was a truly encouraging and beautiful event. But what if someone else’s attitude had been different? Even though they were hearing inspiring teachings, they could have begun to think they were not enough. Or they could have compared one teacher to another, judging who was better. Even something as noble, beautiful, and wholesome as hearing Dhamma teachings could have become a cause of suffering, disappointment or discontent if the person had taken hold of the experience in an unskilful way. Our minds can easily get caught in judgment: ‘this’ is not as good as ‘that’, or ‘now’ is not quite as real or good as ‘that prospect off in the future’ or ‘that great time back in the past’. If this is what our mind is doing, we can look at it. This feeling of disappointment, this comparing mind, can become our teacher in this moment. If we are wise, everything will teach us: the weather, our memories, our physical condition, the environment, the people around us.

In addition to the Thai version, a mixed English/Thai one is also available.

Sunday Talk on the 18th September 2016

Good afternoon to you all. The theme for the Sunday talk this week is ‘Forgiving and Compassion’ so I will offer some reflections around these significant areas of our lives. I will start with forgiving.

This is a very important aspect of spiritual training and, as a way of life, it is a counterpoint to the attitude of being unforgiving, the attitude of wanting revenge, carrying grudges around. It’s about working with those attitudes of mind where we are determined to hang onto our negativity and our hurts, and to wear those proudly upon our sleeves – all the wrongs that have been done to me, the things that were unforgivable – that we are habitually conditioned to carry around and make much of. Sometimes people find themselves building their entire lives around wanting revenge, or resenting something that’s happened to them in their life, there’s something in the heart that can’t forgive.

When I speak in this way, in case any of you are wondering, I’m not reading anybody’s mind. Oftentimes when one starts talking about these themes people think, ‘How did he know!’ Please be reassured that it’s just averages, the law of statistics and how life is for many of us. I cannot read people’s minds.